Reading the Mind in the Eye

I took an online test this week and my results made me feel like a superhero.

The test shows you 36 sets of eyes and asks you to connect each picture with an emotion.

(Take the free test here)

I've always felt a bit awkward socially, so I expected to do... poorly.

I surprised myself by scoring 33/36!

With my low expectations, it felt awesome to find I can read emotions better than I thought.

How good are you at reading other people?

If you didn't already, go take the test!

If you scored high, that's awesome. Your ability to read emotion in others is probably quite strong. 

If you scored low, it's no big deal. One test on the internet doesn't mean much.

And to be fair the test is somewhat confusing.

Some of the words are really similar.

Contemplative or reflective?

Irritated or annoyed?

Aghast! I can't recall a single time I've said "aghast" seriously...

No matter your score, the idea that connecting with others is a skill (just like writing code or building automation) is important.

Learning to read people is a key skill.

In the Salesforce world, its fairly straightforward to "skill up" on something technical.

There's Trailhead. Udemy. Salesforce Help. YouTube.

It's pretty abundant.

But how do we practice our ability to read people?

And why does it matter?

The good news is that "the secrets" of connecting with others have already been discovered.

To skill up we can read books like:

• Social: Why Our Brains Are Wired to Connect by Matthew Lieberman
• How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie
• The 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene (this book is actually banned in American prisons!)

We can join groups and clubs (like Crossfit or pickleball).

We can reach out to family members.

A few key principles go a long way (make the other person feel important!) 

And the risks of low social connection, tricks to improve our empathy, and benefits of high quality relationships are well documented.

• A study published in Medical Xpress emphasized that the health risks associated with loneliness are comparable to those of smoking 15 cigarettes a day.
• Several studies have demonstrated that reading fiction, particularly literary fiction, can significantly enhance empathy.
• The Harvard Study of Adult Development (one of the longest studies of adult life) showed that those who were most satisfied in their relationships at age 50 were the healthiest at age 80, showing a clear connection between relationship satisfaction and physical health.

Salesforce skills are valuable only to the extent that we help others with them.

We could have the sharpest Salesforce technical skillset in the world, but...

• If we can't emphatize with our users
• Communicate effectively
• Or work with others on our team to get results

Then we're not as a valuable as someone with average technical skills who can.

Our soft skills amplify our technical skills.

So if you found out you have social superpowers on the test or are just starting to hone your people skills, remember: like any skill, understanding and connecting with others gets better with practice.

And in the Salesforce world, that practice will pay off!

Best,

Nick